Coaching leaders is one of the things about ministry that I love most. Great coaching is a truly transformational process and contributes significantly toward greater Kingdom impact.
For me, the relationships themselves are personally gratifying. It’s rewarding to have coaching and mentoring relationships also become friendships, and I love seeing my friends succeed.
For context, there is a slight difference between coaching and mentoring, and of course they overlap.
Coaching tends to be more of a week to week or month to month ongoing process, focused on more immediate results, with someone who is a regular part of your life. Investment from a great mentor may only take place once or twice a year, can be from a distance, and usually focuses in on the bigger picture and long term.
Great coaches (and mentors) ask great questions.
The questions are often unique and focused on the individual. But good coaches also have favorite “go to” questions that are helpful every time. I’ve been using one that focuses on two words for at least twenty-five years.
Here it is: Fruit & Joy.
You can frame it up in a number of ways. For example:
- “How would you describe the level of fruit and joy in your ministry life?”
- “Which is greater for you right now, fruit or joy and why?”
- “Tell me about the fruit and joy in your life.”
Here’s how it works.
I write those two words on a napkin, over a cup of coffee, slide it across the table and say something like: “How would you describe the level of fruit and joy in your life?”
It always produces a fantastic conversation, because every time one or the other (fruit or joy) is not quite up to par.
Let me unpack this tool for you as a coach to your leaders.
1) Fruit
I like the word fruit because it carries biblical weight from John 15:1-8. The reference is to results or production (bearing or producing fruit). The idea is one of measurable eternal outcomes. Success always includes results.
Success is not a secular term that should be rejected by the church. Joshua Chapter 1 is one of many biblical examples where God refers directly or indirectly to success. (God promised prosperity and success for obedience, strength and courage.)
Acts Chapter 2 is another. (Believers were filled with the Spirit, many were saved and baptized, and church grew by about 3,000 people.)
In the same way, spiritual outcomes are not subjective merely because they involve people.
- One person saying yes to Jesus is measurable.
- Recruiting one small group leader is quantifiable.
- A rocky marriage restored to health is clear for all to see.
These examples represent the fruit of someone’s leadership.
2) Joy
This is also a specific word choice with biblical context from Galatians 5:22-23. Joy is listed as a fruit of the spirit.
Joy is deeper than “happiness.” There’s nothing wrong with the idea of a surface level happiness, but it’s not wise to measure long-term healthy leadership against something so temporary.
Over the long-haul, there are many days in ministry leadership that are not easy. In fact, some days and even extended seasons, are very difficult.
But even in those tough times you can still experience a deep and abiding joy.
These difficulties are not always directly connected to your work. Sometimes it’s personal and about a problem at home. And it’s simply impossible to separate your personal life at home and your leadership in the church.
God’s love and joy is with you and those you coach.
3) You must have both.
This is the primary insight for the coaching tool. You must have fruit and joy.
If you have one without the other for any length of time, your leadership experience begins to suffer. Over a long enough period of time, your life starts to break down.
Fruit without joy is drudgery.
Results without joy is too heavy a burden for anyone to carry. Every leader needs to cultivate a sense of inner joy.
Joy is cultivated by loving the people you work with, loving your job and loving God. Gratitude and a positive attitude also play a big part.
Joy without fruit is barren.
Joy without results is a fun party, but in terms of your leadership efforts, it is essentially a waste of time.
God designed us to be productive as leaders, and productivity (fruit) is enhanced by growing as a leader, in combination with focused and consistent hard work.
You can’t go the distance without both fruit and joy.
If you want to truly help those you coach, help them grow in both fruit and joy!
Very helpful and encouraging… specifically right now – some new leadership, fresh opportunity to coach from a new place of maturity
Glad this is helpful Nancy. Thanks for your comments!!
YOU have coached me for years with these insights. For the past many years I have used your insights to coach others. Thanks for taking the time to do this for your thousands of followers!
You are so welcome!! Blessings!!
Thanks Coach Dan! For me the more important issue is about my fruit and joy – I have to be planted firmly in my own field of fruit and joy before I can hope to lead others to that growth. The fruit and joy matrix is a simple yet profound way to measure all of our eternal outcomes. Thanks again!
You are most welcome Al! And you are right, this applies to us too!! Not just to those we coach!
Thanks pastor for this great insight! I now have a greater compassion for both: fruit and joy. I plan to share this truth with my team.
Awesome Jonathan! I hope your team finds value in it too!
Great post Dan. Thanks for sharing your wisdom! -Gary
Thanks Gary and you are most welcome! Hope your day is a great one!
Dan, Thank you for your wisdom, once again I gain insight into myself as a leader.
You are very welcome Dr. J!
Amazing blog! Is your theme custom made or did you download it from somewhere?
A theme like yours with a few simple adjustements would really make my blog jump
out. Please let me know where you got your design. Appreciate it
Why people still make use of to read news papers when in this technological globe everything is accessible on web?
Wow that was strange. I just wrote an very long comment but after I clicked submit my comment didn’t appear.
Grrrr… well I’m not writing all that over again. Anyways, just wanted to say excellent blog!
Wow that was unusual. I just wrote an incredibly long comment but
after I clicked submit my comment didn’t appear. Grrrr…
well I’m not writing all that over again. Anyhow, just
wanted to say superb blog!
Can I simply say what a comfort to find someone who genuinely knows what they’re talking about online.
You definitely know how to bring an issue to light and make it important.
A lot more people should check this out and understand this side of the story.
I was surprised that you aren’t more popular because you certainly have the gift.
Superb blog! Do you have any recommendations for
aspiring writers? I’m hoping to start my own site soon but I’m a little lost on everything.
Would you propose starting with a free platform like WordPress or
go for a paid option? There are so many options out there that I’m totally overwhelmed ..
Any suggestions? Thanks!
Good day! I could have sworn I’ve been to this blog before but after browsing through some of the post I realized it’s new to me.
Nonetheless, I’m definitely glad I found it and I’ll be book-marking and checking back frequently!
Thanks for your personal marvelous posting!
I seriously enjoyed reading it, you can be a great author.
I will make sure to bookmark your blog and definitely will come back later in life.
I want to encourage continue your great posts, have a nice holiday weekend!
Hi there, for all time i used to check blog posts here in the early hours in the
morning, because i enjoy to learn more and more.
Hey! Someone in my Myspace group shared this website with us so I came to check it out.
I’m definitely enjoying the information. I’m book-marking and will be tweeting this to my followers!
Fantastic blog and brilliant design.
Hi there this is kinda of off topic but I was wondering
if blogs use WYSIWYG editors or if you have to manually code with HTML.
I’m starting a blog soon but have no coding experience
so I wanted to get advice from someone with experience.
Any help would be greatly appreciated!
I don’t know if it’s just me or if everybody else experiencing issues with your site.
It appears as though some of the text within your
content are running off the screen. Can somebody else please comment and let me know if this is happening to them too?
This could be a problem with my browser because I’ve had this happen previously.
Thank you
This info is worth everyone’s attention. Where can I find out more?
Thanks for the good writeup. It actually was a entertainment account it.
Glance complex to more added agreeable from you! By the way, how could we be in contact?
Aw, this was an incredibly good post. Finding the time and
actual effort to produce a good article… but what can I say… I procrastinate a whole lot and don’t
manage to get nearly anything done.
Wow, this paragraph is fastidious, my younger sister is analyzing these kinds of things, thus I am going to let
know her.
This post offers clear idea in favor of the new viewers of blogging, that really how to do running a blog.
Pretty section of content. I just stumbled upon your weblog and in accession capital to assert that I acquire in fact enjoyed account your blog posts.
Any way I’ll be subscribing to your augment and even I achievement you access consistently rapidly.
I’m not sure exactly why but this weblog is loading very slow
for me. Is anyone else having this problem or is it a issue
on my end? I’ll check back later and see if the problem still exists.
I don’t even know how I ended up here, but I thought this post was great.
I don’t know who you are but certainly you are going to
a famous blogger if you are not already 😉 Cheers!
Great post.
This is really interesting, You are a very skilled blogger.
I’ve joined your feed and look forward to seeking more
of your wonderful post. Also, I’ve shared your web site in my social networks!
Good day! This is my first visit to your blog!
We are a team of volunteers and starting a new project in a community in the
same niche. Your blog provided us valuable information to work on. You
have done a extraordinary job!
Nice post. I learn something totally new and challenging on blogs I stumbleupon on a daily basis.
It’s always useful to read through articles from other writers and use a little something from other websites.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts. I really appreciate
your efforts and I will be waiting for your further write ups thank you once again.
Hello! I realize this is somewhat off-topic however I
had to ask. Does managing a well-established blog
such as yours take a massive amount work? I’m brand new to operating a blog but I do write in my journal every day.
I’d like to start a blog so I will be able to share my experience
and thoughts online. Please let me know if you have any kind of ideas or tips for
brand new aspiring bloggers. Appreciate it!
Great post.
Have you ever thought about creating an e-book
or guest authoring on other sites? I have a blog based on the same ideas you discuss and would
love to have you share some stories/information. I know my readers would appreciate your work.
If you are even remotely interested, feel free to send me an e-mail.
Awesome article.
An intriguing discussion is definitely worth comment. I do think that you ought to write more on this topic, it may not be a taboo subject but typically
people don’t speak about these subjects. To the next!
Kind regards!!
An intriguing discussion is worth comment.
I believe that you need to publish more on this subject, it might not be a taboo matter but usually people
do not speak about these issues. To the next! All the best!!
Incredible quest there. What occurred after?
Take care!
My brother recommended I would possibly like this website.
He used to be entirely right. This submit truly made my
day. You can not consider simply how a lot time I had
spent for this information! Thank you!
Yesterday, while I was at work, my cousin stole my apple ipad and tested to see if it can survive a thirty foot drop, just so she can be
a youtube sensation. My iPad is now destroyed and she has 83 views.
I know this is totally off topic but I had to share it with someone!
Do you mind if I quote a few of your articles as long as I
provide credit and sources back to your blog? My blog site is in the very same area of interest as yours and my users would certainly benefit from a lot of the
information you provide here. Please let me know if this ok with you.
Thanks a lot!
It is the best time to make a few plans for the long run and it’s time to
be happy. I’ve learn this publish and if I could I desire
to counsel you few fascinating issues or tips. Perhaps you
can write next articles regarding this article.
I desire to learn more things approximately it!
I think this is among the most important info for me.
And i’m glad reading your article. But want to remark on some general things,
The site style is ideal, the articles is really great :
D. Good job, cheers